Upon Awaking
My limbs leaden this morning
my head pounding
my thinking dull from interrupted sleep.
Jesus did you ever feel this way?
You were fully human
You too experienced interrupted sleep.
In my kitchen
coffee helps but can’t dispel the sluggishness.
Multiplied needs of others
assail me;
my calendar’s commitments…must be kept
but seem too much…
how will I press through?
I am sufficient You said.
My power is perfected in weakness.*
I believe this is true,
but will You be enough for me today?
A bolt of supernatural energy
lifting my lethargy
would sure be nice, Lord.
But that kind of power from on high
has never been given to me.
Interrupted sleep has been mine,
repeatedly
over and over and over
for decades of seasons.
Newborn needs and toddler demands,
middle schooler and teen dramas
college kids’ wanderings and dangers
empty nest fears and aging aches.
Interruptions never cease
day or night.
Walk by faith and not by sight,*
I remember.
For the eyes of the Lord see the heart*
He looks for those who are fully His.*
Lord what do You see in my heart?
I see discouragement that I cannot rise above
I see limited accomplishment ahead,
And the need for a nap.
I wish I were unaffected by my body’s rhythms
I wish for vitality
I wish for power to rise above
I wish I weren’t so human.
I am wishing for heaven.
I condemn myself when I become impatient,
disbelieving, angry.
but You don’t;
for there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus*
You love me Just As I Am
In all my weaknesses and frailties.
O Lover of my soul,
You know my frame;
You remember that I am dust.
As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear Him,*
who come to Him and say,
“Help me, Lord.”
Interruptions, infirmities, inadequacies
are mercies in disguise,
treasures of grace wait to be discovered in the darkness,
in the fog of my fatigue,
if I will but ask.
Here I am, Lord,
Help me.
I will trust You, believe You are with me,
believe You are enough
for my needs
Amen.
*2 Corinthians 5:7, I Samuel 16:7, Romans 8:1, Psalm 103:13,
Imagining Jesus living with morning fatigue, interrupted sleep, and the continual press of people needing, wanting His attention helps me know I am not alone. Jesus loved the women around Him. He had compassion on their struggles. He has compassion on mine.
And He prays for me before the Father. My devoted Friend and Brother knows my frailties and loves me still. Knowing this is true brings comfort to my soul.
Does such knowledge do the same for you?
May you run to Him in your need. He will never turn you away.